JIBUN SIZE DE IKOU: WATASHI NARI NO BODY POSITIVE

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CHAPTERS

REVIEWS

• 

  Juliko25

  82/100
  One woman's heartfelt autobiography detailing her journey towards body positivity and critiquing toxic beauty standards

  Man, the US has been getting a lot of autobiographical manga these days, hasn't it? My Brain Is Different, A Life Turned Upside Down, Blank Canvas: My So-Called Artist's Journey, I'm a Terminal Cancer Patient But I'm Fine, the stories by Kabi Nagata, X-Gender, The Bride Was a Boy, and so on. Personally, I'm pretty happy that manga companies are bringing them over, as I think it's interesting to see people draw comics about their own experiences no matter which country you're from. They also help to dispel some myths and stereotypes about Japan that most people don't think about. Japan may be a different culture than America or Canada, but Japan and its people aren't a monolith. My Brain Is Different, which I reviewed previously, tells the stories of people dealing with neurological conditions like Autism and ADHD and how they navigate the world. A Life Turned Upside Down tells the story of the authoress' experiences dealing with her alcoholic father and how his actions affected her and her family, along with critiquing the society that enables his alcoholism. The Bride Was a Boy is about the author realizing she's transgender and the story of her transition and eventual marriage to her partner. The subject of today's review, Embrace Your Size, is all about the author Hara's experiences with obesity, eating disorders, and above all, body positivity and the different forms it takes.

  If you're wondering what the phrase "body positivity" means, Wikipedia defines it as a social movement focused on the acceptance of all bodies, regardless of size, shape, skin tone, gender, and physical abilities, while challenging present-day beauty standards as an undesirable social construct. Embrace Your Size details mangaka Hara's journey from a disillusioned teenager who struggled with eating disorders to learning about Japan's own body positivity movement and creating this manga. To her, being body positive means knowing it's okay for her to not fit into a single mold, along with being about empowerment for every body type, and considering Japan is pretty infamous for enforcing values of conformity, even at the detriment of people's mental health and well-being, it's an anvil that really needs to be dropped. Hara goes into detail about how body-shaming in the form of other people making fun of her, making fun of other obese people, not being able to fit into the clothes she wanted, and her own insecurities about her weight negatively affected everything about her life at some point. Even someone commenting on how she draws people in her art felt like a jab at her weight, so she chose to hide her authentic self out of fear, and any obese person can tell you that words can hurt just as bad as physical beatings. But even without being obese, I'm sure a lot of people can relate to Hara's feelings of insecurity about whether she even deserves to dress nice, or worry that people will laugh at her as soon as they see her.

  Hara also goes out of her way to critique both the stereotyped portrayals of obese people in anime and manga, while highlighting some more positive portrayals, such as the 2007 movie Hairspray. Did you know that Japan has this unfortunate tendency to give obese characters in anime deep voices that make them sound almost male? Sadly, that's a common stereotype in a lot of Japanese media depicting obese people. Even shows like Sailor Moon and Little Witch Academia got in on this, though Embrace Your Size doesn't really mention it much. Hara points out how a lot of the stereotyped portrayals of obese people, particularly those who are only defined by either eating a lot, their size, or things that contribute to their size, make people think that they all have the same personality, which anyone can tell you is obviously not true, and I appreciate that Hara shows how being exposed to a lot of these portrayals affected her life and how learning about body positivity and meeting other plus-sized people helped to broaden her own worldview. I also appreciate that Hara points out that sizes can change due to a variety of factors, and not just eating a lot of food, such as illness or side effects from medicine. She even flat-out says that even if some stereotypes do have some basis in reality, it in no way justifies anyone being cruel. Hara also takes the time to point out that body positivity doesn't mean just rejecting working out or dieting, because she herself does plenty of it, only at her own preferred pace and using the methods that work for her, rather than going full keto like most people tend to assume, even highlighting examples of obese people who do work out, not because they want to be thin, but for a variety of reasons, and that whatever peoples' reasons for working out and dieting are valid to them, and that's what matters.

  As for her art, it's definitely not Urasawa-level or anything like that, but Hara's artwork does its job nicely. All the people are drawn cute and chibi, but with plenty of variety and distinction so you can still tell who's who a lot of the time. There are a few color pages in the beginning, and they're all very nice to look at, so Hara has a good grasp on things like color composition, paneling, page flow, and so on. Hara mentions having gone to art school, and it shows in her art, even if it's not on the level of people like Kaoru Mori or Naoki Urasawa. The manga keeps a light but realistic tone throughout, with Hara showing her experiences growing up and learning about body positivity through her own lens. Like with My Brain Is Different, Hara tells her story in a simple but quiet way, with no grand triumphs or overcoming the odds with everyone clapping at the end. Hara only learned about body positivity through seeing a magazine in a bookstore, and it's often the little things that can make the greatest impact. Hara also interviews a plus-sized influencer near the end of the manga and they both share their experiences with eating disorders, learning about body positivity, and the steps they took to become more confident in themselves, which I thought was very sweet. Sometimes all you really need is a support network, people who genuinely care about you without making jokes at your expense and share your experiences, which is a message that can hit home for everyone.

  Seeing as I've never experienced an eating disorder myself, I can't comment on its portrayal here, and Hara's experiences with it are her own, so I have no right to judge how she deals with it and manages it. But on a personal note, I am classified as obese according to my doctor, along with having high cholesterol, even though I only weigh 169 pounds as of this writing, and it is due to eating a lot of stuff I shouldn't. As much as I try to exercise and eat healthy food, I don't do it as often as I should, and because of a lot of my sensory issues due to being autistic, I can't tolerate the taste of a lot of healthy foods like asparagus, oranges, milk, and so on. Believe me, it's not for a lack of trying, and since I work from home, I can't leave the house as much as I want to. But that's just my own personal experience with my own weight issues, as everyone's experiences are different, as Hara mentions. While I myself admit that I'm still struggling with my own journey with body positivity, I'm sure others who read Embrace Your Size will feel understood and validated, just like My Brain Is Different did for me. It's great that we're getting more non-fiction manga like this, and I highly recommend Embrace Your Size for any person who is struggling with the way they view their body without feeling patronized or condescended to.

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